Sunday, December 13, 2015

Saturn and Neptune in the Mutable Signs

It’s so funny the things we remember. At my age, it’s a miracle to remember anything at all, but on beginning to think of the Saturn-Neptune square in the mutable signs, what popped into my head was an old Alka Seltzer commercial. Remember Terry Kiser from Weekend At Bernie’s? In the commercial he was the green-around-the-gills young groom, who paced in the bathroom as his bride lay in bed in a poufy blue peignoir, and they discussed the meal she’d just made, a frighteningly enormous dumpling, oversized to “impress” her new husband. As he gulped and tried to hide the evidence of his digestive discomfort while offering her loving praise and assurances, she made suggestions for tomorrow’s dinner from the cookbook clutched in her newly married hands. “Marshmallowed meatballs,” she said, and he winced, holding a towel over the glass to muffle the plop-plop-fizz-fizz.
Marshmallowed meatballs. All these years later it stays with me, the image of something much too horrendous to eat. Some things aren’t meant to go together. They just don’t fit. That’s pretty much how I feel about Saturn, the planet of Karma and earthly life lessons, and Neptune, the planet of illusion, delusion, and spirituality. They don’t understand each other, they have a hard time collaborating, and they just don’t belong on the same plate. Neptune is marshmallows and Saturn is meatballs.
And while we’re on the subject of disgusting foodstuffs, let me mention one word: cannibalism. Don’t get squeamish on me, please, because I promise this mention will be brief. And no recipes will be included. But just the other day, I saw an episode of Perception, the Eric McCormack crime drama in which he plays a schizophrenic brain expert who consults with the FBI and uses his hallucinations as insight into the case. In that episode, a robber was hospitalized, certain he had a disease contracted in an exotic island where he participated in ceremonial consumption of human flesh. Weird, I thought, never having heard of this before except in cartoons about cannibals. But then as I started looking at past transits of Saturn and Neptune in hard (clashing) aspects (square, opposition, and I also included conjunction) in the mutable signs (Gemini, Virgo, Sagittarius, Pisces), one of the events listed all the way back in 1809 was called the Boyd Massacre, in which natives of that same island killed and ate sixty-six crew members and passengers of the brigantine Boyd.
It’s mid-summer 2014 at this very moment, and obviously that episode was written before the current Saturn in Sagittarius-Neptune in Pisces square, which is precise on November 26, 2015, June 17, 2016, and September 10, 2016. But the thing about energy is it’s in the ether, a floating, formless vibration of sensation that lurks within reach of our sensors until it’s channeled in by some human who makes it a reality. If you think about it, that very process is the combination of Saturn and Neptune which actually works. Neptune is the vibration and Saturn the actualization. Obviously I’m not advocating eating humans as a means of internalizing their spirits, but I am saying that ideas float until someone grasps them. And in this case, the idea was in the ether before the transit and that writer used it to create a plot for a modern television show.
And this just in: here I am sitting writing, and a friend on Facebook just commented on a post I made about never having seen any of those Planet of the Apes movies, the newest of which opened this weekend, and were they the ones in which Charleton Heston commented that Soylent Green was made of people. Finally we realized that no, Soylent Green was the title of another science fiction movie, but it was about eating people. And guess what two planets were opposed in the mutable signs Gemini and Sagittarius in 1973 when the movie came out? Apparently eating human flesh is connected to Saturn-Neptune hard aspects. I’m not going to obsess about this idea too much longer, but you have to admit that it’s quite peculiar what comes up when you think about astrology. I do want to include a quote from Wikipedia about the movie, “The film combines the police procedural and science fiction genres, depicting the investigation into the murder of a wealthy businessman in a dystopian future suffering from pollutionoverpopulation, depleted resources, poverty, dying oceans, and a hot climate due to the greenhouse effect. Much of the population survives on processed food rations, including ‘soylent green.’” What I think is interesting about this is the dystopian theme, something widely in use now in movies and TV shows. Saturn-Neptune in the ether already.
And while we’re mentioning dystopian realities, the climate issues are very interesting, partly because right now, forty years after Soylent Green’s cinematic reality of greenhouse effect, we’re experiencing it. If you think back to the winter of 2013, there were record temperatures, frightening cold on the U.S. East Coast, not much of a winter at all on the West Coast. One of the patterns I observed during Saturn-Neptune clashes in the past several centuries was record temperatures all across the globe. It went down to minus degrees in places like Florida, Louisiana and even California, and way down in the minus degrees in places more used to winter, although not winter as cold as what happened.
In addition to the strange merging of reality and fiction, right at this moment in the news is a story about a Malaysian jetliner which was shot from the sky by rebels in a Russian stronghold. While jets being shot down isn’t a pattern in my Saturn-Neptune research, jets crashing into each other is.  I don’t think of these planets as airplane-oriented, but maybe they are. I also don’t think of them as energy-oriented, but they definitely are. Of course you know that Neptune rules the seas, the mist, drugs and drink, and fuels that fit into those categories do come to prominence during these transits. For example, the first steam propelled vessel crossed the Atlantic now. The Hoover Dam was completed and began transmitting energy to Los Angeles. In Kansas, the first alcohol power plant was formed. The same year an explosion caused by leaking gas ripped out part of a Cleveland Stadium. In further events involving the seas, a lighthouse was built on Alcatraz Island, and the Suez Canal was given a royal concession and linked the Mediterranean Sea with the Red Sea.
Another story in the news recently was a law passed in France forbidding women to appear in public in veils, which some felt was a slap in the face to those whose religion demands they wear them. During a Saturn-Neptune clash in the 1800’s, wearing masks at balls was forbidden in Boston. Religious freedom is another issue, as is slavery, during this transit.
Drugs are under the Neptune umbrella and during various Saturn-Neptune hits, many drug related issues arose. In Portland, Maine there was a Rum Riot. Along the lines of rum, it was during Saturn-Neptune that Javans first began to arrive in Suriname to work on sugar plantations. Rubber isn’t sugar, but Firestone Tire and Rubber Company was founded now. In the 70’s, America worked with the USSR and 70 other nations to agree to ban biological weapons. In the same year, the Kentucky Derby winner was dethroned because of drugs administered before the race. And most famously, Richard Pryor was badly burned while free basing cocaine. Also that year, the Supreme Court ruled that new forms of life created in labs could be patents, and in my mind, most shamefully this year, they truncated personal freedoms of workers by siding with Hobby Lobby whose claims of religious prohibitions allowed them to stop providing certain forms of birth control in health insurance policies.
I also think of Saturn-Neptune energies as bad for money, and in fact the first great financial panic of the 19th century occurred in 1819 during this connection. Also during this energy, diamond workers in Amsterdam went on strike and gold hit a record $400.20 an ounce in Hong Kong in 1979. The price today is about $1310, which if you think of it isn’t that much more considering it’s been thirty-five years.
As you can see, the energy we’re discussing produces events that are odd, quirky, strangely dangerous, and philosophically perplexing. Let’s take a moment to consider the vibrations of these two soon-to-be-warring planets.
Although many people consider Saturn their least favorite planet, it’s not difficult to understand. Saturn is the energy which allows you to work toward improvement on the things with which you have difficulty, even from lifetimes past. Saturn requires that you deal with our Karma, and if you’ve done something not so nice, chances are that will be returned to you in kind so you can see how awful it is. Sometimes this can represent weaknesses that can’t easily be overcome. A simple example might be tobacco. I know of a case of a high school boy who tried chewing tobacco for a short time and soon developed a fatal carcinoma in his mouth. He didn’t survive until college. Chances are this is a substance he can’t tolerate in any lifetime and he was learning how risky it is. Theoretically in the next lifetime he’ll be more like me, someone who despises tobacco in all its forms and speaks up to anyone smoking near me. I shouldn’t be so smug, though, because sugar is my drug of choice and maybe some Karma from that will be visited on me, in a form worse than my expanding waistline. One of the roles of Saturn is to help us all reject negative substances.
Saturn is also all about work, and it’s not easy work, but the kind where you plug away for a long, long time. Saturn shows that effort expended results in rewards attained. This can be a good thing for those impatient folks who like only instant gratification, because sometimes it feels more rewarding to build something over time. Doing so also gives structure to your life, and structure is another Saturn theme. As the ruler of Capricorn, the architect of the Zodiac, Saturn requires a sturdy foundation to support something, whether a building, or the decades of your life. A person who has spent many lifetimes floating from one thing to another without investing in anything might come in with a prominent Saturn in order to learn the value of discipline and commitment.
Learning the value is a good phrase to use when considering Saturn and its role in the universe, for that is what Saturn provides, a system whereby you can learn the value of something you might not naturally understand, but once learned you’ll be grateful you did. People who have difficult marriages but who stay in them and make it past the crises say they’re grateful for having weathered the bad times because ultimately there are good times and they like the shared continuity. Of course, people who have the courage to leave bad marriages are often also grateful when they find a better pairing with someone else. In either case, Saturn is usually involved. For Saturn can teach you to make what’s not working work better or to understand what never will work and to move on. The whole point being work, another Saturn theme.  Saturn just wants things to work smoothly and move forward adroitly, like the hands of a fine Swiss watch. This makes sense because Saturn rules time.
Time is a very important Saturn concept, for we here on earth are all bound by its limits. For those of us who drift along, never focused on the fact that tempus fugit, eventually comes the realization that opportunities we thought were limitless are in fact limited. For everything there is a time, and eventually that time is gone. You can’t wait until you’re sixty to become pregnant, for by then your uterus will be a dried up raisin. You also can’t diddle your way through life and feel that you can start a career later. Law school won’t accept you at seventy. Saturn is here to help you with internal and external limitations so you can make the most of the short span of your life here on earth. Its goal is that by your death you can look back and feel you’ve made progress. Saturn is a planet whose energies function on the earth plane. Once you leave the earth plane, the rules change. And here we come to Neptune.
Unlike Saturn, Neptune works best on a different plane. Neptune is about the spirit world, the essence of reality that exists beyond our time-dominated earth plane. In spirit, a year can seem like a blink. Something can be true and yet untrue. Something that is far from concrete can make the best sense, even if no facts are there to support its veracity. With Neptune, there is a different way of knowing, a sensation rather than a fact, in a realm where two plus two is no sort of standard at all.
Neptune is experiential rather than goal oriented. It doesn’t care if something doesn’t work out, for having had the experience is all that matters. Fall madly in love with someone who turns out to be a bozo sleazebag? Why not. For even if it crashes and burns, you will have had the pleasure of feeling your heart soar, and that experience opens you up to other, more universal and more loving vibrations such that ultimately you will be a better person even if your heart is shattered and you can’t leave the bed for a year. It’s worth it to understand the nature of true love.
In life here on the earth plane, we are all grounded within the flesh, but Neptune seeks to unground, to soar, and to release. With Neptune you can sense the infinite, connect with spirit and with God, and its energy is pure and holy. But for those people whose drug use allows them to feel this abandon into the infinite, its energy is a scourge, for they are too weak to resist the lure of the drugs. It’s like being madly in love with someone, breaking up, and receiving that call to go out for a drink. Your heart leaps, you think this is it, we’re back, and you go. Maybe it’s a booty call. Maybe it’s a request for a loan. Sleazebags don’t change their stripes, but inside this person, you see something better, something magical, and you want to go for that drink. Such is Neptune, it allows you to see what might be, the best possibility, the dream rather than reality. And the fact is that what you’re seeing is genuine, but that still doesn’t mean it will supersede the crap and become the blissful vision your heart yearns for.
I’m writing about Neptune in reference to romance, for that is easiest to understand, but when you exchange romance for drugs, the metaphor is the same. When you exchange it for a career goal, you can wait tables for thirty years and keep going on acting auditions, waiting for your big break. The dreams Neptune brings are so magical and seductive, they’re hard to resist, hard to reject. They’re just that real. And the thing is, they are real. They show what could be in the best of all possible worlds. If you can truly believe without the doubts to say no way, that could never happen, I could never pull that off, then you can take a Neptunian dream and make it a reality. You can be a movie star, whether you have talent or not. The only thing that prevents it are your own doubts. Or sometimes it’s a desire for security, something Saturn knows all about. You might not want to be a vagabond on friends’ couches for decades while waiting for that break. So it might feel better to settle for something you know you can have.
This is the war that many people endure, the safe vs. the sorry. Aim lower, be assured of success. This is Saturn versus Neptune. Saturn doesn’t do it to be mean, for Saturn wants you to be safe, and the easier route is usually the safest. Neptune, which knows no fear, not even fear of death, just shrugs and figures the experience is worth it and after that comes another experience.
The question is, inside your own heart, which energy speaks most to you? Can you picture yourself being an actor, a ballerina, a writer, and can you picture your efforts being rewarded? Do you hate alarm clocks enough to risk being self-employed and all the vicissitudes that could come with that choice? Do you need to know you’ll have people around you and choose to reproduce with a so-so partner just because you see no other option, or are you willing to see what else could come.
Ultimately, push always comes to shove in our world, and it is our own choices that define where life takes us, even if we have no clue we’re making those choices. If you feel safe and secure, you easily take more risks. If you need money to feel safe, you might like a more secure job choice. Stop for a moment and consider your own life. What does it say about your genuine needs, about you and the choices you have made, for wherever you are, you made the choices to get where that is. And, it was Saturn and Neptune at work nudging you to that destination.
We have been in an interesting period of time, first with Uranus and Pluto breaking down lots of structures in the world. Now, with Saturn and Neptune, the question is where can dreams lead you and what can you do with them. That is always the aim when these two planets collude, even if the aspects are contentious as they are now. There will be a see-saw effect. “Should I go after that dream, can I make it happen, how can I make it happen, can I take a year off, living on savings and see it through?” Those are the sorts of questions we all will be asking as Saturn and Neptune hit our horoscopes. Don’t be mistaken, however, for with these challenging aspects, it’s far more likely that we will be giving up dreams that don’t work than working toward dreams that will.  Maybe. In any case, whatever actions are taken during this period of time, personal life lessons will arise, and more clarity about the true nature of our own heart’s desires will result.
 Neptune has been in Pisces, its own sign, for some time now, and will remain there until spring 2024. Saturn moves into Sagittarius in December, 2014, and will already be in aspect to the Saturn-Neptune square (90 degrees apart). In fact, if we want to be precise, the square will begin when Saturn is in Scorpio, for a 10 degree orb is normal for that aspect, and thus we will feel it in November, 2014. I hope you won’t be serving your neighbor for Thanksgiving instead of a turkey! In June of 2015, Saturn is back in Scorpio but still in aspect to Neptune. It returns to Sagittarius in September of 2015.
With Saturn in Sagittarius and Neptune in Pisces, obviously those two signs will strongly feel this energy. Both signs are known to be dreamers and to enjoy a lack of rigidity in their daily lives. Now this will change. Maybe you’ll have the idea to begin a new hobby, or even a career, and it will require training. Every craft requires the acquisition of skill, and that could be something as simple as learning to take better photos with your cell phone. You might feel the call to volunteer some of your time to a good cause, to work for the betterment of your world. Or you might sense that you’ve been dreaming too long, and that you should make those talents pay off. That’s assuming your Sun is what’s being hit by the Saturn-Neptune square. If other planets are aspected, you will deal with the issues of those planets. If it’s your Moon, you could decide to stop drinking, or to go on one of those liquid diets, or you could move, downsize, or take in a border, perhaps a relative. If Venus is involved, you might have to choose between suitors.  If Mars gets hit, you might have to work on behalf of someone else, like those who join the Peace Corps. Those are direct hits in the two signs, but more than those signs will be affected.
There are four Mutable signs, and any planet in Virgo or Gemini will also be affected, perhaps even more strongly. Planets in Virgo will oppose Neptune, making a T-square out through Saturn, and that would tend to imply that dreams will be heeded but they won’t work out. This could be the point at which you decide that you’re not going to be a movie star and that you should put that accounting degree to good use. Planets in Gemini will oppose Saturn, making a T-square out through Neptune, and that could mean logical, solid efforts won’t exactly pay off, for unknown eventualities will present themselves. Or you could toss that accounting degree the day before you’re slated to slip into the three-piece suit and move to Hollywood to follow your bliss as a wanna-be actor.
Another thing to consider is transits by the other planets which will amplify this energy. The Sun, Venus, Mars, and even Jupiter will be in the Mutable signs at some point during the period of this transit. Some of the two years in which Saturn and Neptune are involved in their square will be more intense than others because the aspect will be more precise. In August, 2015, Jupiter enters Virgo and it will amplify this energy quite a bit.
Fall of 2015 features connections from Mars and then Venus in Virgo along with Jupiter. That will mean there will be a T-square focalized out through Saturn. People can ask for help that others don’t want to grant. During this period the first precise square will occur. It makes me wonder if there will be some sort of natural disaster in which people have to come together to volunteer to help the affected.  In December, 2015 through January, 2016, the Sun in Sagittarius and then Pisces, Venus in Sagittarius, and Jupiter in Virgo will create another T-square.
Spring and summer, 2016 will be significant months. In March, the Sun and Venus are in Pisces, and Mars is in Sagittarius, while Jupiter is in Virgo, once again making a much-amplified T-square. By May and June the energy is more extreme because the Sun and Venus are in Gemini, and thus there is a Grand Cross. It sounds to me like there will be many attempts to create a workable solution to a difficult problem, perhaps caused by personal attachments on the individual level. Also in June, the Saturn-Neptune square is precise, so that increases the energy even more. It’s during these months that we will see the real power of the transit and what it truly means. Anyone with planets in any of the mutable signs, particularly in the middle of the sign will feel this energy profoundly.
So does this mean that if you don’t have planets in any of the Mutable signs that you’re getting away without being hit by the Saturn-Neptune square? Do you really think that could happen? Um, no! The two houses of your horoscope where Sagittarius and Pisces lie will be hit by this aspect, and because these are slow, repeating transits, they will affect you over a longer time period than just an aspect to your Sun. In short, we all will feel this energy, and must be ready to make the most of whatever life tosses us.
If you have Aries Rising, Saturn will transit your ninth house and Neptune your twelfth. Are you living according to personal deep truths? Are you honest with yourself and honorable with other people? Neptune lures you into some deep moments of introspection, where events from the past can play out again in your mind so that you can make better sense of your own past. Then Saturn asks you to reevaluate your system of morals and to find an inner justice that will become your credo for living.
If you have Taurus Rising, Saturn will transit your eighth house and Neptune your eleventh. The obvious caveat here is to avoid financial entanglements that could be disadvantageous involving friends. The issue goes deeper, however, for now it’s up to you to make sense of the role of money in your life and how other people figure into it. Did you give up a set of goals or expectations to ally yourself with a partner who is financially secure? Do you now regret that and wish you could be set free? Have you sold out? Are your dreams buried somewhere in favor of a life you now view as mundane? Once you ask and answer these questions, you can go forward to build something that matters to you, perhaps a smaller life with more meaning.
If you have Gemini Rising, Saturn is transiting your seventh house and Neptune is in your tenth. Are you with a partner whose company you no longer adore? Is your career working out or are you in the grips of someone else’s dream. This is your chance to evaluate your connections with other people and how everyone in the world views you. You need to find the path that truly matters to you and the companions who will enrich your life.
If you have Cancer Rising, Saturn is in your sixth house and Neptune your ninth. First of all, focus on your health. If you need to take better care of yourself, do so. This is not the best time to become involved with alternative health practices. Go get a check up. Make sure the meds you take regularly are properly prescribed at the correct dosage. Once you’ve done that, examine the day to day of your working life. Are you happy with your job or do you feel you’re surrounded by people who are not simpatico at all? You may want to begin meditating, particularly if you’re in a stressful work environment. Finding inner peace is essential now.
If you have Leo Rising, Saturn is in your fifth house and Neptune in your eighth. This could mean that you could be seduced by a partner who wants your cash, or you could mess up a relationship and also lose money as a result. Or you could feel that your relationship is crashing and burning emotionally and sexually. Clearly you have some questions to ask yourself about your romantic life. Children also may cost you money. Your creative side is another factor in this transit. Maybe you’re afraid to try to earn money doing something you love and wish your mate would carry the financial burden so you can shine. If you have a mate who expects this of you, that could be problematic.
If you have Virgo Rising, Saturn is in your fourth house and Neptune in your seventh. You must confront issues with family, such as your childhood background or even your mom in present day as well as a sense that you’re not getting what you need from a mate. Perhaps you’ll flee a strained home environment to run to the arms of someone who turns out to be other than what you initially believed. The real point here is to work on yourself. You need to look inside your own heart and uncover the falsehoods and equivocations you’ve been using to make it through the day. It might not be comforting to discover new truths, but it will be helpful.
If you have Libra Rising, Saturn is in your third house and Neptune your sixth. Don’t assume that everything you need to know about your health is right there on the Internet. Ask an actual doctor, but then do your own research to understand your health more completely. Be careful about the meds you take, and the negative substances you consume. You might decide that this is the perfect time to volunteer your services in a neighborhood program and although frustrating, such a choice can be very rewarding. You might also express yourself via writing.
If you have Scorpio Rising, Saturn is in your second house and Neptune in your fifth. You might have been on a creative path you loved but which was financially unrewarding. Now you reevaluate that choice. If it’s work, you should be paid for it. Or you may feel you’re on such a compelling journey with a creative project that a little belt tightening is well worth it, whether you make money immediately or not. You may thus reconsider some of your expensive hobbies in an effort to expend less of your resources. Children can cost you money now.
If you have Sagittarius Rising, Saturn is in your first house and Neptune in your fourth. Emotional issues come into play. You feel strained and over burdened and it seems that nobody loves you. Everyone who loved you before still loves you, however, and it helps to remind yourself of that. While it’s positive to examine the feelings emerging connected to your childhood, make sure you’re viewing them honestly and accurately, not through the lens of some hurt feelings. Insecurity is a big issue now, and it comes in handy if you’re working harder to prove yourself and become a success. If you find depression is a big issue now, get some help.
If you have Capricorn Rising, Saturn is in your twelfth house and Neptune your third. The past seems particularly compelling now, and you might feel like sitting around, snuggled under the covers, and daydreaming about whatever used to be. This can be useful if you have events and feelings which were long-buried and you need to confront them so you can move on to a happier present day. You might spend time connecting with a psychic on the phone, but make sure it’s a reputable one. This can be a creatively rich period, one in which you get many inspirations about projects, but not one in which you necessarily produce anything beyond thought.
If you have Aquarius Rising, Saturn is in your eleventh house and Neptune your second. This is another one of those situations in which you could get bilked by a friend’s pie in the sky ideas for huge success. Neptune in the second doesn’t always steal your money, however, because sometimes it brings the big dream that does pay off. The key is in understanding your own goals and desires and what you truly want as well as what you’re capable of doing. Another issue is keeping up with other people. Are you insecure and determined to impress your friends with your wealth and success? If so, you might learn that other things are more meaningful.
If you have Pisces Rising,  Saturn is in your tenth house and Neptune your first. Obviously there’s a call here to actualize your dreams, but first you have to look after your physical self. Are you well? Do you eat right? Are you swallowing buckets of coffee and sugary beverages daily? Do you need a drink to get through the day at work? These are serious questions and they point to serious issues, for the temptation now is to say it’s all too hard and just to drift along in a fog of inactivity. Life is hard, yes, but discipline combined with good ideas can really pay off.

We are in a very interesting period of time, one in which we all can be transformed into much better versions of ourselves. This is happening on a societal level as well as an individual one. The key is in being willing to allow that to happen and knowing what your genuine best looks like. It’s a process—a worthwhile process. Good luck!

Wednesday, January 22, 2014

2014 Skyscape

2014 Skyscape

Sometimes we enjoy those lazy, indolent periods, each day sliding into the next with nothing terribly compelling happening.  It’s possible to look back and say, “Hmm did anything happen last year?  I can’t remember.”  Let’s be clear: this is not one of those years.  Stuff is happening, too much stuff really.  Once I saw a video of a Las Vegas hotel that was coming down.  Demolition experts had located charges strategically according to engineering protocols and at a precise moment they did something—radio waves maybe—and with a single click the charges went off.  Or maybe they went off sequentially.  And in what was basically a nanosecond, the giant structure imploded.  It just sunk down upon itself into a pile of rubble.
Well, maybe I’ve gone a little overboard with my metaphors here, because in no way am I saying or implying that life is imploding in 2014.  There just seems to be something happening pretty much constantly, and we’re not talking about little transits but big fat bursts of energy that could affect us individually or as a whole.  It’s not primarily a mellow period of time.
Can I even choose a big newsmaker with which to start?  I think so.  I’ve been writing about the Uranus-Pluto square quite a bit, and without a doubt this is the significant energy of our times.  It was this bit of energy which likely brought back to mind the Las Vegas demolition mentioned earlier, for this is certainly the sort of celestial pyrotechnics that describes events such as that.  Is there more demo going on now across the globe?  I don’t know but maybe you could check with friends who are architects or construction workers. 
It’s good to consider and understand the Uranus-Pluto dynamic, but after you do so, you’ll realize something even more significant.  Uranus and Pluto together, in square, remember, not a congenial trine, are working to find some level of balance and compromise in ways to break down the status quo and implement change.  It’s volatile energy, but how is that energy manifested, and when, and this is the question you will naturally ask yourself once you’ve finished considering all the possible manifestations of Uranus square Pluto. 
I always look for the outlets, the ways in which the energy will blow out.  Where’s the blank spot, you might ask, where’s the logical point of expression and movement.  And the answer is obvious—when another planet occupies a spot in either of the other two cardinal signs.  So if we have something transiting in Cancer or Libra at a similar degree—and keep in mind that Uranus and Pluto are mid-sign lately so really their energy is felt throughout most of Cardinal signs even when nothing is occupying those points in Cancer or Libra. 
Just take a moment and consider what I’m saying, for it’s essential in reading a natal chart or making predictions.  Look for the way in which the energy will express itself.  Where will it go splat, if you will.  I always look for the missing leg in any configuration, so if it’s an opposition, look for the mid-point, because that’s where the energy will be expressed, either natally or by transit.  In this case, it’s a square, so we look for the point where a third planet will oppose either Uranus or Pluto, creating a T-square, or where two planets will fill in the blanks creating a Grand Cross, this time in the Cardinal signs.  At those points in time, life will get busier and this Uranus-Pluto energy that we feel as a sort of buzz, will manifest into events which will be noticed and remembered. 
The planet creating this outlet for energy will determine not just what the energy will feel like, but how long it might last.  If, for example, it’s the Sun, then expect an event around that day, but not much longer.  If it’s a bad event, like we endured on 9-11, a day is even too long, but sometimes life can turn on a day, as it did on that single day.  If it’s something slower, like Jupiter, then there will be events over a longer period of time, and perhaps the stronger events will occur when something like the Sun or Mars is also in aspect.  The more participation, the more energy will manifest and more events will occur. 
2014 can boast a great deal of planetary interaction, not just little two-planet connections, but bigger configurations involving more of the solar system.  It’s like those fireworks displays on the 4th of July.  At first there’s a blast, then another, then a bunch together, then a crescendo.  This year we have more bunches, more crescendos.
Pluto this year moves between almost 11 and 13 degrees Capricorn.  Uranus travels between 8 and 16 Aries.  So if you add 10 degrees for an orb, you can see how most of degrees of the Cardinal signs will be affected.  This means that Aries, Libra, Cancer, and Capricorn will feel this energy virtually all year, and even if your Sun isn’t in the Cardinal signs, but a planet is, you will feel it via that planet.
In 2014, not counting the days in which the Sun will transit Libra and Cancer, making a Grand Cross, we will have Jupiter, Mars, and Venus, and sometimes more than one of them, involved with Uranus and Pluto.  The periods in which Jupiter is in Cancer, opposing Pluto and making a T-square out through Uranus can be extremely volatile.  Although we think of Jupiter as benign energy, in fact it can amp up a sense of nationalism and the sort of misguided pride that causes inflamed and demented reactionaries to fly planes into buildings in their enemies’ countries, which to them would feel like a victory but to rational people, a tragedy, which is just what happened on 9-11.
There could be a positive side of this T-square, such as when a building is imploded and a grander structure takes its place.  Hopefully we’ll see more of that.  There’s much talk now about gun control and this could also be a manifestation of this energy, particularly after the tragic shootings at an elementary school.  That’s the problem—Pluto and Uranus together are not particularly kind and even when an ultimately positive outcome results, such as gun controls, it’s hard to say the outcome made the cost worthwhile.
For good or for ill, the T-square involving Uranus, Pluto and Jupiter dominates the first half of the year and is in effect virtually all that time, whether more or less precisely.  So even if I don’t mention it below, assume it’s happening because it really doesn’t go out of aspect until July.
Mars is one of the main planets we count on to provoke events.  It keeps the universe humming and because of it we move forward, from one thing to the next.  We get up and get going thanks to Mars.  Often the planet of action enjoys stopping in a single sign and squatting there for months, then it moves along in a normal fashion, blazing through the rest of the Zodiac.  This year, Mars is in Libra in January (actually the preceding December) and it remains in Libra almost until the end of July.  That’s seven months in which it has the opportunity to set off the Uranus-Pluto square, and part of that time it connects with Jupiter in Cancer, and there’s the Grand Cross.  If crazy people are going to commit ill advised acts, expect them to do so now.  By the end of October, Mars is in Capricorn and stays there through most of November, once again boosting the transformational or destructive vibration of Uranus plus Pluto.
Even sweet little Venus, benign planet of love, will join this configuration, and so it can provide outlets for this energy when it’s in the Cardinal signs.  It’s always relatively close to the Sun, so it’s not hard to know when to expect these hits.  Keep in mind, if you’re looking at a transit list, it will show the precise hit, so you might not see all the planets there because there could be a difference of a degree or two, but know for sure you will feel this energy and that there will be effects from Pluto-Uranus connecting with the various configurations involving planets in the Cardinal signs.
Neptune continues its slow swim through its own sign, Pisces, and this year it moves between 3 and 7 degrees.  This means that the lovely transit of Jupiter trine Neptune has already passed—if you’re looking at a precise no-orb transit list, but really when we use orbs, we can say that Jupiter in Cancer will trine Neptune in Pisces not impossibly widely through mid-May.  This is very beautiful, spiritual, kind energy that fosters personal growth, encourages some level of self-sacrifice in favor of a loved one’s needs, and provokes charitable actions on many levels.  It’s also nice energy for creativity and the water signs Cancer, Scorpio, and Pisces will particularly enjoy it.
What I would look for here would be two things—something sitting in Scorpio in the middle of the sign to provide a Grand Trine in the water signs, and/or something in one of the earth signs making an opposition to any of the players, in order to focalize that watery energy.  Do we have that?  Well….  Saturn is in Scorpio, yes, until the end of the year when it ducks into Sagittarius.  This year Saturn moves between 16 Scorpio and 0 Sagittarius.  It will certainly trine Jupiter in Cancer, with varying degrees of orb, but at best it’s 9 degrees away from Neptune, so we can’t really say there’s a Grand Trine, which isn’t such a bad thing because even in a trine, Saturn and Neptune are clueless in each other’s presence.  And we can’t really expect Mars to fill in because by the time it’s in Scorpio, Jupiter’s in Leo.  The only geniuine flashes beyond the basic trine that we will feel in the water signs will come from the Moon, once a month in Scorpio.  If you wanted to, you could track those days and see if there are any increased blessings coming from Neptune and Jupiter then.  Or if in your own chart you have early to mid-sign planets in Scorpio, you will feel this energy personally.
We will see a square between Saturn and Jupiter starting in the fall.  Jupiter this year will move between 10 Cancer and 22 degrees Leo and when it’s in Leo it will make the Saturn square.  It will also make a trine to Uranus in Aries, so fire sign people, be on the alert for this energy, for it will amp up the bits of your nature that are tempestuous and speedy.  Once again, what I would look for here is something in Taurus or Aquarius so that we’d see a T-square which would bring us some events.  We don’t quite get it precisely, for as Mars is in Aquarius at the end of the year, Saturn moves into Sagittarius then, but it is a wide, out of sign T-square and there will be some energy but not as much as if it were precise and in sign.
Let’s go through the year month by month to observe how and when the details will be in effect.
January: The year begins with the Cardinal Grand Cross thanks to a Mars-Jupiter square on the 8th at 15 degrees.  By the 31st, Jupiter is opposing Pluto at 12 degrees, amplifying this energy.  We also have Venus in Capricorn, playing into the Grand Cross.  On the 11th, it makes a nice sextile to Saturn in Scorpio at 21 degrees.  If you have planets in earth or water at those degrees, you might feel the urge to express your creativity in a balanced way such as with a new wall unit that will both display and organize your treasures.  On the 16th, Venus is square Mars, but this simple square is, once again, not just about love and lust as Venus and Mars together are known to be, but it’s the fuel that energizes the Grand Cross and could indicate the timing for events occurring this month.  Venus is retrograde in January and makes its station at 13 Capricorn on the 31st, directly interacting with Pluto.  But remember that Venus is in the same sign with Pluto, not Cancer or Libra so it boosts the energy of the configuration but provides no outlet.  Mars and Jupiter play that role.  We should see some events in January, however because there are three heavy hitters in aspect, Jupiter, Uranus, and Pluto along with Mars and Venus.  I wonder how many people will fall madly in love under this energy, consider it deeply exciting, unavoidably fated, and the greatest thing ever.  If that’s what does happen, it’s not exactly a terrible outcome for this transit and certainly nothing world shattering.  There could be negative events such as drunken college rampages and rapes.  Still these are on a more personal level rather than anything universal, but there are other more international scenarios that we could also imagine.
February: Toward the end of the month we have two bits of energy.  Venus, now direct, makes a sextile to Saturn at 23 degrees and the effects will be similar to what we saw in January.  More intense is the Jupiter square to Uranus at 10 degrees on the 26th.  Thus we see a T-square with its energy focalized out through Uranus virtually all month long, and even though Pluto is at 12 Capricorn, that is still a pretty strong T-square, one in which irrationally foolhardy choices can be made.
March: Mars goes retrograde at 27 Libra on the 1st and Saturn follows on the 2nd at 23 Scorpio.  Also on the 2nd is another Mars-Venus square at 27 degrees, and that being substantially beyond the positions of Uranus and Pluto makes this an aspect only about love and sex.  It’s also a creative aspect.  Picture a wild artist obsessively working on a creation.  On the 5th, Venus moves into Aquarius and by the 6th, Jupiter is direct in Cancer at 10 degrees.  It seems a relatively simple month, but keep in mind as I mentioned above, Uranus is Square Pluto, T-Square Jupiter virtually all this time.  They just don’t make precise aspects.
April: Venus moves into Pisces April 5th and on the 11th makes a conjunction with Neptune, very pretty energy for love and creativity.  It’s a nice time to visit a faraway lover or even to fingerpaint.  Pluto goes retrograde at 13 Capricorn on the 14th.  Starting the 20th, we have a strong cluster of precise energy for several days involving the Cardinal Grand Cross.  Jupiter squares Uranus at 13 degrees first and by the 20th, it opposes Pluto.  This is as precise as it gets and I’ll be very surprised if we don’t see some events in April because all three major players are connected precisely with no orb.  On the 22nd, Mars in Libra squares Jupiter, then it moves to oppose Uranus on the 23rd, also squaring Pluto that day.  So mark those dates on your calendar, for there could be some extreme energy between the 20th and 23rd, and if you have planets at 13 degrees in any sign, expect some events involving their vibration.  I’d say that’s not the best time to travel.  I don’t know if there are big sporting events now but there could be some brawling if so.  There can be explosions, plane and car crashes, volcanic eruptions, science experiments gone wrong.  I’m sure there are dozens of other possibilities as well.
May: On the 2nd, Venus moves into Aries, joining the other planets involved in the Cardinal Grand Cross.  On the 19th, Mars stations at 9 Libra, amplifying this energy even further.  On the 24th, Jupiter does double duty, continuing its involvement in the Grand Cross, but also making a trine to Saturn.  This could mean that all the energy for explosive change and upheaval will somehow filter out through Saturn, like in one of those week-long conferences among warring nations who are brought to a peace table by the United Nations.  It could also symbolize one of those implosions I mentioned and the rebuilding of a better structure.  In that case it would be literal rebuilding not metaphorical.
June: Venus is busy in June, aspecting Neptune, Mars, Pluto, Saturn, and Jupiter, but Venus moves quickly, so this is just a touch of sweetness added to the energy of those planets.  On the 14th, Mars squares Pluto, more significant because it’s one of those fill in the blank configurations, making a somewhat precise T-square focalized out through Uranus, which could describe all sorts of bad behavior, temper tantrums, and massive sweeping changes.  We also have a far less precise Grand Cross, thanks to Jupiter, but at 22 Cancer it’s almost out of orb.
July: On the 18th, Venus is in Cancer, once again providing a leg for that Grand Cross, which Jupiter will soon vacate.  Venus also will aspect all the outer planets.  On the 16th, Jupiter moves into Leo, bringing more energy to the fixed signs through mid-September.  It will give a boost as Saturn continues to slow those signs down.  Mars is in Scorpio on the 25th, so it will energize a little even with Saturn demanding precision and temperance.  On the 28th Venus opposes Pluto, then on the 31st, it squares Uranus, making a T-square focalized out through Uranus again, giving rise to some spectacularly stupid romantic choices at the least.  Remember those ancient wars begun because of some crazy romantic reason?  Will there be another Helen of Troy?  Well, she was mythological, so maybe we’re okay.
August: We continue the emphasis in Fixed signs now through mid-September and the Cardinal Grand Cross is no longer a worry, unless the Moon completes the empty leg, which won’t bring too much energy.  The month begins with a nice trine from Venus at 16 degrees on the 1st to Saturn.  Also today we have Mars at 3 degrees square Jupiter in Leo, which can be playful energy devoted to sports or any project that requires oomph and not too much deliberation. On the 7th, Mars trines Neptune and could bring a desire to travel to faraway destinations, not all that odd in August, a month often devoted to vacations.  On the 12th, there’s more Fixed sign energy with Venus moving into Leo and of course the Sun is here now as well.  On the 14th, Jupiter makes a quincunx to Neptune, expressing a desire for deeper spirituality.  Mars makes a sextile to Pluto on the 15th, and maybe we could say it’s little aspects like this that act as pressure valves, allowing some of the built up energy of the Uranus-Pluto square to be released.  On the 23rd, it is quincunx Uranus, so it activates that square between that period of time.  On the 25th, we have a Venus trine to Uranus, providing a similar though less intense potential to release energy, and also today Mars conjoins Saturn, bringing a need for stamina to work projects.  We could envision something needing change and a relatively immediate response to restore things, such as the emergency help after a natural disaster.  I don’t mean to predict so many negative things, but these things do match the imagery of what’s happening.  Most times, however, what manifests is less intense and more benign.  Then we see Venus making a square to Saturn and then Mars on the 26th and 27th, respectively, once again minor energy.
September: Now we begin to see a bit more energy for the Mutable signs with, of course, Neptune in Pisces, but Venus enters Virgo on the 5th and Mars Sagittarius on the 13th.  By the end of the year Saturn will be in Sagittarius, but let’s not get ahead of ourselves.  The truth is for most of the year it’s the Cardinal signs which get the most energy.  On the 5th, Jupiter makes a quincunx to Uranus from 11 Leo.  That could provide a fleeting boost of energy for change, I suppose.  Mid-month Venus aspects some of the outer planets, then on the 21st, Mars is square Neptune at 5 degrees.  That could be as simple as travel plans needing modification or as difficult as chemical issues or oil spills though the latter seems not terribly likely.  Pluto makes a station at 11 degrees on the 22nd.  By the 25th, we see some redemption energy in the form of a trine at 15 degrees from Jupiter to Uranus.  Venus enters Libra on the 29th, once again activating Uranus-Pluto.
October: Mars is mid-Sagittarius now and on the 4th, it creates a Grand Fire Trine with Jupiter and Uranus. This is certainly energy of courage and big change which likely will be quickly implemented.  Venus is square Pluto on the 8th and opposes Uranus on the 11th, creating another T-square for several days.  Also today is Mars trine Jupiter at 17 degrees, a nice aspect for positive energy and physical activity.  Also in aspect although imprecisely is Jupiter square Saturn, happening through December.  On the 23rd, Venus is in Scorpio followed by Mars in Capricorn on the 26th.
November: We have some relatively insignificant transits early on, but then on the 10th, Mars conjoins Pluto, then squares Uranus on the 12th, creating some intense energy and a likely period in which events will occur, perhaps explosive ones or at the very least the sort that require a response from other people.  Also on the 12th Venus conjoins Saturn, nice energy for building something artistic with balance and constraint.  Venus is in Sagittarius on the 16th, bringing a pleasant little sweetness to the mutable signs.  Also today Neptune stations at 4 degrees.  On the 20th we have Venus and Neptune in square, probably not an aspect that will produce much except maybe some music that you don’t like playing in the background.  Mars is quincunx Jupiter at 22 degrees on the 24th, so don’t be hasty and lose track of some essential items or make a wrong turn while driving.  Venus trines Uranus on the 26th, providing a tiny escape valve for the Uranus-Pluto energy.
December: Mars and Saturn are sextile at 27 degrees on the 1st, so do some chores, then Mars moves into Aquarius on the 4th.  Also today Venus trines Jupiter at 22 degrees, so consider socializing with friends or likeable professional contacts.  Jupiter makes a station at 22 degrees on the 8th.  Venus is in Capricorn on the 14th.  The 15th shows Uranus and Pluto in a precise square at 12 degrees and by the 20th Venus has conjoined Pluto and squared Uranus, making that antsy energy focused a bit on romance.  I just wonder what starlet will leave her husband amid fireworks, real or emotional during this transit.  On the 20th, Mars is sextile Uranus so hopefully people will work toward change that isn’t terribly explosive.  Uranus goes direct at 12 degrees on the 21st.  On the 23rd, Saturn moves into Sagittarius and many Scorpios will breathe a sigh of happiness.  The year comes to its astrological close on the 28th, with a Venus-Jupiter quincunx at 22 degrees.  Maybe we all will be taking advantage of those after-Christmas sales—or they will be taking advantage of us.
So were you wondering how all of this would specifically affect your own sign?  I gave you some idea already but let’s consider the Zodiac in order.
Aries: It’s a good thing you’re a natural firecracker whose motto is the more excitement the better, because with Uranus in your sign for years, it feels like the ordinary, the calm, and the expected are nowhere in your equation.  Any planets you have here, including your Sun, are being hugely challenged this year with the Grand Cross in Cardinal signs—namely YOU.  Any time something is in Libra you feel it even more strongly and when it’s in Cancer, as Jupiter is for quite a while, you feel as though your entire life is changing.  That’s not such a bad thing for this is your opportunity to remake yourself and to build something new out of the past.  While there’s the Grand Fire Trine in October, look for positive opportunities for change.
Taurus: Nobody thinks it’s fun to have Saturn opposing your sign for a long time, and you can attest to that.  This year you finish that transit of judgment and find that you’ve learned a lot as a result of all the criticism.  It’s time to consider ways in which you can make positive changes in your life and to rebuild.  Take advantage of Jupiter in both Cancer and Leo to gain inspiration about the best directions in which to go.  Neptune in Pisces can also be a softening effect which allows you to dream and then to manifest your vision.
Gemini: Can it possibly be that everyone else is just a whiner?  Life seems pretty A-okay to you and you don’t really feel in the mood to complain.  Sometimes you get the urge to alter the status quo thanks to Uranus in Aries, but it’s a mild urge that you can take or leave.  Unless Mars or Venus is aspecting you directly, you feel that things are moving along congenially, well perhaps with the exception of Neptune making a square into your sign.  You feel that there are movies to see and tunes to hum and if that distracts you from reality a little bit, why not.  But keep an eye on Saturn because as it moves into your opposite sign you will have to deal with feedback from other people and that won’t always be fun.  The plus side: you have nearly all of 2014 to wait before it does so.  And meanwhile you can enjoy Jupiter in Leo, which inspires you to learn more and have grand adventures.
Cancer: Like the other Cardinal signs, you don’t feel it’s exactly been fun.  You have Pluto opposing your sign and that has led to losses and separations which feel rather painful.  The problem is the square from Uranus could be the reason why and it could be that you are the instigator of these schisms.  Ask yourself if all the rocking of your boat is what you truly want.  Jupiter in your own sign would normally bring blessings and it probably will bring some, but it also heightens the energy for change and for making risky choices, so it might be wise to train yourself to slow down a little and to consider if you can truly commit to the course you’re about to embark upon.  You’ll particularly feel this intense energy when Mars is in any of the Cardinal signs.
Leo: Saturn has been squaring your sign and there’s nothing you dislike as thoroughly as the potential for disapproval aimed at you instead of praise.  It’s not been fun at all and you look forward to December when Saturn moves into Sagittarius, which feels orderly but not invasive.  But take heart, for the summer brings Jupiter right into your backyard and with this expansive energy in your own sign, you feel happy and optimistic and ready to take advantage of the many likely opportunities heading your way.  If Saturn has encouraged you to shut down certain aspects of your life, Jupiter will point you toward the next, much happier chapter, and it all will feel worthwhile.
Virgo: Neptune opposing your sign has been disorienting for sure, and if you’re a teetotaler like me, there might have been some days when you sighed and wished you could become a drunk.  Chances are you did not, but there may have been some peculiar health manifestations.  All you can do is try to focus on the best way to take care of yourself and to bring happiness into your life.  A strong sense of spirituality helps carry you through.  Pluto in Capricorn makes a trine into your sign and that’s certainly helpful when you need to release aspects of the past.  Saturn in Scorpio hasn’t been a bad thing for you because it provides the need for order that is comfortable to you and it helps mitigate some of the Neptune-driven fuzziness.  When Saturn moves into Sagittarius it will be more difficult.  Neptune will still be challenging you and Saturn will demand that you use that fuzziness and do something with the creative impulse that is more than just a daydream.
Libra: We’ve said it before and now we’re saying it again—Cardinal signs watch out.  Pluto is sending you a square, demanding that you release old aspects of yourself, something which might not have pleased you, but with Uranus opposing your sign, maintaining the status quo is practically impossible.  So you’re in a period of change, which isn’t always terrible for someone who can’t make up his or her mind.  But with Jupiter in Cancer, your sign is the empty leg in a very tumultuous configuration, making it feel as though you are the wiffle ball and everyone else has the bat.  Change is happening, and it’s your challenge now to take matters—and yourself—in hand and to make change good, something you will ultimately like.
Scorpio:  Saturn has been making demands on you and it feels as though you’re chained up to some extent, which you might like if a little kink could be added in.  But no, it’s usually about work and responsibilities, something you’re not ill equipped to handle.  You can hunker down with the best of them, but that doesn’t mean you won’t cheer when Saturn exits your sign and beleaguers Sagittarius instead.  You’re happy with Jupiter in Cancer because it’s sending you pleasant, watery encouragement.  Pluto, your ruler, in Capricorn isn’t terrible for you unless it’s breaking down the business side of the company which employs you.  It’s been frustrating but you see Jupiter as your silver lining and you’re right.  This could be your chance for some new beginnings.
Sagittarius: You like the idea of the Grand Fire Trine in October because it feels lively and with Mars in your own sign then, you feel you’ll have freedom and excitement, two of your favorite things.  Likewise mid-year when Jupiter is in Leo, you enjoy twelve months of new opportunities and carefree fun, so you are totally on board.  Neptune has been squaring your sign, of course, but it inspires you to travel and meet exotic people, something you enjoy.  You do realize that Saturn is bearing down on you with the insistence of a police cruiser, but it’s practically a year away, so your plan is to gather ye rosebuds now and for as long as possible, and yes it’s a very good plan.
Capricorn: The final member of the pity us we’re Cardinal signs club—that’s you and no, you don’t like Pluto in your sign, but somehow you can deal with the power struggles as long as you can win.  You don’t like Uranus monkeying with your sense of security and stability because the opposite of those things does not please you and Uranus bring chaos, also a four letter word in your book.  The bottom line is you’ve been forced to change huge aspects of your life for quite a while now and you’re hoping that some of the arrows you’ve shot at the sky will hit their mark.  Jupiter in Cancer could be the harbinger you need, for that will bring volatile energy, particularly when something is also in Libra, but it can provide you with the energy you need to change something for the better and to build something else.  Saturn in Scorpio is an aid in that regard. 
Aquarius: Yes, Saturn in Scorpio has brought you more than your share of annoyances, and you’re not fond at all of following anyone else’s rules.  You’ll be happy to see it in Sagittarius, which is more congenial for you.  Uranus has encouraged you to make a few changes recently, but in a rather mellow way.  What will be particularly nice will be post-summer when Jupiter is in your opposite sign Leo.  That brings you optimism and the chance for some wild and crazy fun, things you enjoy very much.  
Pisces: Neptune.  In your own sign.  For years.  Well, you say so what.  Other than some wonky symptoms regarding your health, you don’t really mind at all because it brings an enhanced spirituality and some deeper creative self-expression.  That’s a good attitude and always looking on the bright side is one of your most special qualities.  You also are excited about the burst of energy provided by Jupiter in Cancer, which encourages you to be your very best self, something you aspire to daily.  You do feel that Saturn is no fun no matter where it is, but in Scorpio it’s working to help you maintain order even as Neptune encourages you to abandon it.  Saturn in Sagittarius is another matter.  It will war with Neptune and your basic nature.  So what do you do?  You use Saturn to express Neptune, just like when they tell you to make lemonade out of lemons.  It’s the process of making—doing—that brings both vibrations into balance and helps you create the life you want to live.

Now I must run and leave you to contemplate my Venus in Libra.  With all these heavy hitters aspecting it, shouldn’t some hunky cave man be there at the ready to drag me back to his lair.  I do have Neptune opposing my Sun.  Wait!  Maybe he’ll have a Jacuzzi.
This post was excerpted from an article which appeared in Dell Horoscope Magazine.